3 Minute Monday – Progress, Deathbed Regrets & Getting Laid

3 Minute Monday

Hi friend,

“You have to focus on progress toward a specific thing in the medium term or sacrifice meaningful progress toward everything in the long term.”

This is one of the biggest lessons I’ve taken from the last few years.

As someone who likes doing new things and is seduced by novelty, there is always an easy distraction available.

The chance to start a new sport or training style or hobby or adventure or business project or life goal or whatever.

In his book 4000 Weeks, Oliver Burkeman explains why you need to decide in advance what you’re going to suck at.

When you start to do any focussed pursuit toward a goal, you will inevitably have to let other things drop.

When those areas of your life start to lag, the discomfort of seeing your progress slow or reverse can be difficult to stomach.

So you change your focus a little to stop them from slipping, and start paying less attention to your priority.

Let’s say you decide to get a business off the ground.

You’ll probably not be able to socialise as much or go to the gym as frequently.

These are the things you’re going to suck at.

After a while of building your business plan out and getting things moving, you notice that you’ve had to miss out on some weekends away with friends and you’re not as lean as you used to be.

The temptation is to take your focus away from the priority (business building) because as a Type-A go getter you don’t like sucking at anything and you believe that you should be able to crush everything in life, all at the same time.

This is a fallacy.

By narrowing your focus and periodising your life, you can make meaningful progress toward one area of your life, as opposed to no real progress toward all areas.

Some things are going to start to slip.

This is fine, it’s a signal that you’re prioritising your energy elsewhere.

MODERN WISDOM

I do a podcast which has had 60 million+ downloads. You should subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

This week’s upcoming episodes:

Monday.
500k Q&A – is loveless sex empowering? How do you train yourself to deal with political idiots? What are my reflections on depression in my 20s? Another big one.

Thursday.
William Costello – the researcher behind one of the world’s biggest incel studies on the black pill phenomenon, why women are seen as second class citizens and the modern mating crisis. Don’t miss this one.

Saturday.
Ben Greenfield – the world’s most famous biohacker on how to hack your sex life. Also why Zevia is the best no-calorie soft drink and what most of the fitness industry is getting wrong.

THINGS I’VE LEARNED

1.
Some top deathbed regrets.

I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

I wish I didn’t work so hard.

I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

I wish I let myself be happier.

2.
Business acumen always wins.

“The richest NFL player in history is not Jerry Rice or Peyton Manning, or one of these great players.

It’s Jerry Richardson, who played for two seasons, and then bought a whole bunch of Hardees franchises.” — Seth Stephens-Davidowitz

3.
Men will do what women demand of them in order to get laid.

“Although this may be considered an unflattering characterisation…we have found no evidence to contradict the basic general principle that men will do whatever is required in order to obtain sex, and perhaps not a great deal more.

One of us characterised this in a previous work as, ‘If women would stop sleeping with jerks, men would stop being jerks.’

If in order to obtain sex men must become pillars of the community, or lie, or amass riches by fair means or foul, or be romantic or funny, then many men will do precisely that.” — Roy Baumeister & Kathleen Vohs

LIFE HACK

Free Rush Shipping on Amazon Prime.

Once you’ve ordered something on Amazon Prime, go onto your order history and edit the shipping.

For lots of common items, you can change to select free Rush Shipping which will deliver the item to you later that day.

(Taken from Jonny on a new Life Hacks episode, dropping soon)

Big love,
Chris x

Never miss an episode by pressing Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

PS
I’m in London today on the Lotus Eaters Podcast, then heading to Rome this Thursday. Europe fully has me now.

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