3 Minute Monday – Vulnerability, Incels & Parents

By Chris Williamson

June 26, 2023

3 Minute Monday

Hi friend,

This weekend we filmed by far the most over the top, cinematic podcast production we’ve ever attempted.

Over $100,000 of kit flown into Florida, a full production team of 10, an insane warehouse location and the most followed guest I’ve ever brought on Modern Wisdom.

Guest announcement coming this week.

One of the conversations I had on this episode was about vulnerability.

“Never be vulnerable in front of your girlfriend” is common manosphere advice.

The guy I was talking to is more alpha than pretty much every other human that’s ever existed, and yet he told me a story of how he sobbed on the bathroom floor in his girlfriend’s arms when the pressure got too much for him.

Then he got up, dusted himself off and went out to dominate his challenges and become a world champion.

Here’s the thing, hiding your vulnerability from the world doesn’t make you any less vulnerable, it just makes you less honest.

You don’t change the way you feel by hiding your feelings from the world.

Limits on speech are just limits on sincerity.

If you believe that being vulnerable makes you a pussy, how do you arrive at the conclusion that feeling vulnerable and ALSO not being able to open up about it somehow makes you less of a pussy?

If your concern is that your partner will lose respect for you if she sees you being vulnerable then one of two things is true:

1. Your partner is incapable of having an emotionally open, mature relationship and it’s a massive red flag.

2. Your masculinity fundamentally rests on such a fragile foundation that a single display of vulnerability is sufficient to push it over the edge.

Your internal fear is that you’re so inherently unlikeable that you’re one wrong move away from being friendzoned? That doesn’t sound very high value.

Is it possible that if you have such a low opinion of women and think they can’t be trusted to help when you’re vulnerable, then women are going to sense that in you and respond appropriately.

If you ARE weak then showing weakness is not a signal of high value.

The goal is to be so strong that you’re able to truly open up about your difficulties before you get back on the arena floor and crush the competition all over again.

Larping as a strong stoic guy is not the same as actually being one and if the only way your partner can respect you is if you lie about what’s happening inside yourself, you’re heading toward disaster.

The most popular stories are always when a hero encounters challenges, overcomes them and triumphs in the end.

Transcending and including your emotions as a man is much more heroic to me than pretending they don’t exist.

Maybe I’m wrong.

Maybe every woman’s sex drive immediately scurries away the second any man opens up, but if that IS true, something tells me it only happens when she fundamentally doesn’t respect that man in the first place.

Being strong > appearing strong.

MODERN WISDOM

I do a podcast which has had 220 million+ downloads. You should subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

This week’s upcoming episodes:

Monday.
Scott Griffiths – a clinical psychiatrist explains why men’s body dysmorphia is on track to overtake women’s. Bigorexia and muscle dysmorphia are rising insanely quickly and no one is talking about it. Fascinating.

Thursday.
Megan Phelps-Roper – why is Harry Potter the most banned book of the 21st Century? Why is JK Rowling a flashpoint for all trans issues? How does growing up in the Westboro Baptist Church give you a unique insight?

Saturday.
Chris Ferrie – an actual quantum physicist explains why people believe all kinds of BS about quantum physics. Energy healing? Raising your vibrational frequency? Transcending into the quantum realm? What does any of this mean?

THINGS I’VE LEARNED

1.
Incels are much more likely to be autistic, depressed & anxious.

Depression, anxiety, and autism in incels vs the general global population:

Depression – 38.6% vs 3.6%
Anxiety – 37.13% vs 2.6%
Autism – 18.38% vs 0.62%

Singledom definitely doesn’t cause autism.

But what is the direction of causality here?

Are incels depressed and anxious because they’re single?

Or are they single because they’re depressed and anxious?

h/t Alex DatePsych

2.
The Parental Clout Gauge.

Do you know how I know when a news story has reach genuine mainstream significance?

It’s not when it trends on Twitter or hits daytime news or lands on front pages.

It’s when my dad messages me on Facebook about it.

“I see your colleague Mr Rogan is in the news again.”

3.
Birth rates be falling.

Decline in birth rate 1950-2021:
South Korea: 86%
China: 81%
Thailand: 79%
Japan: 77%
Iran: 73%
Brazil: 72%
Colombia: 70%
Mexico: 70%
Poland: 69%
Turkey: 68%
Russia: 67%
Saudi Arabia: 67%
Malaysia: 66%
Morocco: 66%
Ukraine: 66%
Italy: 65%
Canada: 63%
India: 63%
Peru: 63%
Bangladesh: 62%
Myanmar: 62%
Spain: 62%
Vietnam: 61%
Indonesia: 60%
Algeria: 58%
Egypt: 58%
Nepal: 57%
Philippines: 56%
South Africa: 52%
United States: 52%
France: 49%
Argentina: 47%
Kenya: 44%
Germany: 43%
Yemen: 42%
Ghana: 41%
Uzbekistan: 41%
Iraq: 40%
United Kingdom: 39%
Pakistan: 37%
Nigeria: 19%
DRC: 9%